


"Babe, it's not even Halloween."

by fangirlingalchemist



Category: Free!
Genre: Fluff and Crack, M/M, Makoto and Souske are married, THERE ARE CHILDREN, domestic AU, it's crack, total crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-16
Updated: 2015-10-16
Packaged: 2018-04-24 06:16:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4908496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirlingalchemist/pseuds/fangirlingalchemist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the kids start to misbehave, Souske can only think of one way to make them behave. It doesn't go to plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"Babe, it's not even Halloween."

**Author's Note:**

> This fluff is my apology for that angst-fest yesterday. Hope you enjoy my first attempts at writing children characters lol :)  
> Also, the prompt was "naughty or nice" and I din't feel like smut, so here!

The sounds of children screaming echoed throughout the house. Makoto put away the groceries quickly. He had left the kids with Souske (already screaming) for only an hour, to go shopping, and upon return, it _still_ sounded like the world was ending. It seemed like their kids never knew when to just _shut._ _up_.

Cause of apocalypse: Inconsiderate demon spawn using freakishly loud echolocation to locate their victims, causing the everyone's brains to bleed out of their ears.

Honestly, he had no idea where his kids got their strong vocals from, as he was a very quiet "mom" person and Souske was downright stoic in his stereotypical "dad" silence. The only time they got loud at all was...... nope. Not going there. Though he kinda missed when they _could_ , without first hiring a babysitter and going to a hotel, where the only people to hear them wouldn't get traumatized by Makoto's moaning out the lyrics to an 80's rock ballad.

Makoto nearly dropped the eggs when a particularly loud shriek permeated through the halls. _Good god_ , they were coming this way! He braced himself for impact, setting aside any breakables.

The first body to make contact, did so with a _thump_ , right into his stomach, making him go _'ooph.'_  

"Hello, Rei-chan."

The next body nearly took out his legs, his shrieks making Makoto wince. "Miss me already, Nagisa-kun? I was only gone for an hour, you know."

" _Daaaaaaddy_! Papa was being mean!" Rin-chan whined, grabbing onto his arm.

Makoto laughed, what children interpreted as mean was usually ridiculous: making them eat green peppers, for example, or not letting them wear butterfly make-up to Grandma's funeral, or not letting them bring their 5 foot, penguin plushie to school, or canceling a trip to the pool, due to rain. He sighed. _Kids_. Speaking of, one was missing, "Where's Haru-chan?"

"Over here, babe." Souske wrapped his arms around Makoto, from behind, kissing his shoulder. He sighed heavily, it had, apparently, been one _looong_ hour.

Haru maneuvered himself from Souske's arms, to Makoto's back, effectively swamping him with ~~screaming children~~ , _affectionate family_. 

"So how was Papa being mean this time?"

Souske just huffed, to exhausted to defend his honor from those who wished to darken it. 

Rei, being the most collected out of them told their story (Haru didn't count, the kid was practically a robot ~~making him Makoto's favorite~~ ) He pushed up his glasses dramatically. Another thing, he didn't even need glasses, he just like to push them up and down his nose. Souske swore that one day he would wear off the skin there.

"Papa said that if we didn't stop trying to swim in the toilet bowl that Santa Clause would put coal in our stockings."

Makoto just looked at Souske, who shrugged. "Babe, it's not even Halloween. Kinda early to bring up St. Nick, don't you think?"

"It's never to early for Christmas." Souske replied drearily, "At least, that's what my Reindeer sweater wearing colleague has been telling me **_all_**. **_year_**. _**long**_."

Makoto simply sighed sympathetically, "Understood, let's hire a babysitter."

Souske's face lit up, like a Christmas tree, "A full night's sleep? I love you."

"I love you too, Santa. Now, hand me your phone."

"Can't Rin used it as a bath toy."

"Oh, then just hand me mine from the counter."

"Nagisa is sticking it in the blender."

"Okay." They watched him clambering on the counter, "Watch me, Rei-chan! Rin said that this is how you make a robot." It took a while for it to sink in.

"Nagisa NOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

There was a loud crunching sound, then the power went out. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Whelp! That was fun to write! Only two more days left! :D


End file.
